Happy Anniversary MustardSeeds!!!!!!

Happy Anniversary MustardSeeds!!!!!!

Okay, this post is a tad late considering that our cg was formed in June last year and its 1st of July 2009 today.

Looking back from where we started and where we are now... I am really left in awe of how God bond and gel all of us who are so diversified together as one family. I looked at each and everyone of mustardseeds and I know I've had the pleasure and the first hand privilege of seeing each and everyone grow in their walk with God. For that, I am grateful to God for putting us not by chance or fate or luck but by His wonderful plan together as one family. I hope God will take us deeper and closer to one another as we draw nearer to Him in the next half of 2009.

On a totally separate note now... recently I came across some baby article (before u think otherwise.. pls note that this was really by CHANCE that I came across this short article on babies.. =.=) it was said that if both parents participate actively together in looking after the child, the success rate of the child being confident, happy, filial (something along these lines la.. cannot rem) would be very high.

I told that info to my husband and guess what was his reply? "Oh really? Okay, I will look after our child actively with you too. Next time, I hold the child, you hose it down to bathe it ya?".
=.= After that, I was struggling between being serious and yet I can't help laughing at what he said.

Ever wonder why we aren't having children yet? That's why. Hehehehe.

When Darth Vader Meets Hello Kitty...

My husband and most folks know I have a thing for Hello Kitty... as for him, he has a thing for Star Wars (Most men do anyway.. hehe). So one morning he sent me this...

*source: unknown.. got this from my husband who got it from the web*

The Little Lessons In Life....

March and April went by in a whizz. No wonder I keep hearing older folks say each year passes faster than the previous. I never felt that way until now that I have to agree that saying is true. March was a marvellous month... Birthday surprise after surprise by my husband, my cg mates, my colleagues, my best bud Joan... and most of all by God himself. Reminding me time and again that I am loved by Him. And then there was Taipei - where we celebrated our one year wedding anniversary. Taipei in short was splendid. Time away and alone with my husband always refreshes both of us. Always when I am travelling.. I think about God even more. Strange. Lol.


So came April. And to be honest.. I can't recall anything much for April except the fact that I was involved in the Image Team for the Easter service doing make-up for alot of people. I think that marks the most pairs of eyes that I applied eye liner and mascara on in my lifetime. Lol. The chance to testify God's goodness on stage in church - nerve wrecking! Ohohoh.. and then I was surrounded by my managers one fine day at work (yes, I am not kidding. They came to my desk in a group.. giving me a shock) and the next thing I know, I was coordinating Big Boss' birthday party. I joked to my manager in charge that if only I could have this on my performance appraisal. Lol. =)


Now that we've come to the month of May. Almost half of 2009 is gone. As I was on leave today.. I pondered on the recent things on my mind. And I have decided to blog this entry down again as a reminder to myself of the little lessons in life that I have learned thus far and also to blog down the many swirling thoughts on my mind recently:-

The most precious commodity

• Time. Speaks for itself yet often taken for granted by most. It's amusing and amazing when I read somewhere previously that the average man (and women of cos.. ) spends 5 years waiting. Yes... 5 years. That includes waiting for taxis, waiting for ur friends, waiting for your internet pages to load, waiting to be served at an eatery, waiting in a queue for things, etc. *Gulps* That is quite a lot of waiting time.

The Past, the Present and the Future

• Too many times.. we looked at the past and remininsce the past for too long. We worry about our future and we forgot how to appreciate the present. Too many times (even I myself fall into that) we keep asking the "If Only... " or "What If"... but truly forgot to enjoy the now.
  

Pricked by a single rose

• One time my colleague sent me a powerpoint and what caught my eye on one of the slides which I remember up until today is this lesson:- "It's crazy. We get pricked by one rose and we stopped loving roses altogether." I thought that was a very meaningful message. How often in an attempt to protect ourselves from being hurt again we end up losing our compassion/passion.

Of expectations and standards

• I learned throughout the last few years (especially in the recent years) of how people easily have a set of expectations and standard of how one should live, behave, react, etc. Often when they imposed such expectations and standards on others... I find it very strange that too often the same people who imposed such 'benchmarks' cannot reach these expectations/standards that they set themselves. OR they really hate it when ppl imposed the same on them OR they cannot wait to dish out these expectations and standards YET when it comes to themselves it seems the situations have changed in such that it is okay for them to react differently from the same standards and expectations they imposed cos theirs is an exception case. Through the years, I find that I come across more of such ppl and wonder what gives?! Hehe.

Happiness is a state of emotion ... whereas joy is a daily decision

• At least the above statement/little lesson is applicable to me. Being joyful in the Lord, being grateful to the Lord for the things we have and the things that we've already been blessed with is a decision. When I say this.. I speak for myself. I learned recently that happiness is different from that of joy.. especially inner joy. It is a daily decision that I have to make - to be joyful in the Lord regardless how my day will end. I find that when I make that decision my day is already a much better one already despite how it will unfold. The fact that I am breathing and able... is already a joy that my God has blessed me with.

Turning deaf to negativity

• You may find it strange but I was listening to Gwen Stefani's "Whatcha waiting for?" song and I was inspired by that one sentence sung in her song "Tick tock tick tock.. Look at ur watch now.. u're still a super hot female... ". I know its kinda lame.. BUT I am not saying I am a super hot female. What I am driving at is that sometimes I think it is good to turn a deaf ear to negativities (is there such a word? oh well if not.. I just made up a new word!! *pats my own back* heeeee) that are really bad for us. For instance, after some observations I realised that ppl have this mentality that "oh I am getting older, I better not do this for fear of my bones will crack ... I injure myself... I get hurt... and the list goes on". I'm not talking about serious strenous exercises that will injure our bodies. But I am talking about allowing fear and the "negativities" grip us such that we don't live a fuller life than we should be truly living! I look at Joshua in the bible and in his old age he still wants to fight! How amazing is his positive mind and attitude! I want to have that kind of attitude even as I age! Even George W. Bush senior did an amazing sky diving feat at the age of 80!!! http://www.usatoday.com/news/nation/2004-06-13-bush-jump_x.htm

So yes, these are just my little lessons in my life. Things that I have learned and things that are on my mind even mroe in the recent years. =) Okay then.. until next year! Wahhahaha just kiddin.

>>P/S: Special kudos to Shuping who always chases me to blog because without her.. I wouldn't be blogging this entry. So this is just for you. =)

This Is What Doing Life Means...

I am blogging this down as a sweet memory and again to make an altar in my life to remind me of God's goodness.

Last Thursday we had our cg. During P&W, I thought Esmond led well and for me I felt God's presence strong amidst us. After that Shuping & Reina led discussion and thought they did well too considering it is their first time. It was a short but sweet lesson.

But as I read the notes again ... HS brought about a revelation to the notes on intercession, a lot of thoughts and examples came into my mind all of a sudden. He gave me the examples of Jesus at Garden of Gethsmane, He reminded me of Abraham interceding for Sodom, etc. It happened on the spot. After I shared about it, I went home and went .. "Did I just say this???"... God you're amazing.

Afterwich we prayed for each other and Shuping's sharing for me was spot on (Thanks, Shuping! I needed that!).

What was also amazing was that we came together as one on our knees to intercede for others in our cg. It's not about the kneeling down part that was amazing. It's the resonance that everyone had and shared - that everyone was willing and ready to intercede, to stand in the gap for another that was amazing. While praying, I heard the Lord say "This is what doing life means... this is what cg is all about and I am well pleased". I am touched...

God, You brought us this far from being a new cg last year.. bring us deeper to where You want us to be. Bring us closer to Your heartbeat and thank you for showing me time and again that this is what caregroup means.. what doing life together in your Kingdom means.

The Little Things That Mean So Much...

Been meaning to blog about this way before I went to Lombok and cleanly forgot about it.

About a month back, I wasn't feeling exactly enthusiastic towards my life in general. Not sure why and also can't remember why too.

As I was dragging my sorry feet and body home after work one evening, I came back to my lil' lovenest and saw this:-

I noticed that my hubby have been packing the bed and even to the extent of folding our PJs neatly. A smile came on and when he came home that night, I asked him why he even folded our PJs and he said 'to make it feel like hotel so baby (yes, that's madame~ here for u) can enjoy when she comes home from work mah' and he grinned at me.

It's really true.. it's the little things that mean so much.. Thank you, Oonie-chan!! I am blessed to have you and I am spoilt by you!

The silver lining

Recently my husband and I were in the car and we were on our way to somewhere. The skies loomed with dark clouds and the last bits of the sun that was peering out from the surrounding gloomy clouds could still be seen.

It was then, I exclaimed to my husband "Look! Silver lining in the dark clouds!". It was one of the most shiny silver linings I have seen. In fact, I don't recall myself really paying attention to the silver lining which was shining so brightly as the dark clouds continue to block out the sun.

The melancholic in me begin to ponder about life. As I think about my life in general, I discovered that I had the same attitude towards life in certain situations. What I meant to say is that it is also during dark times of my life that I dont pay attention to the silver lining that is still shining ever so brightly in my troubled and sad times.

Perhaps because like the clouds and sky that are so dark during heavy rains and that these dark clouds sprawl fast over the sun, problems and difficult situations too seem to spread out quickly, blocking the good and happy times in my life. Maybe my eyes have been so affixed on the problems and hard times that my eyes cannot see or pay attention to the silver lining in these times.

While I was thinking about all these, it started to rain. The smell of rain always stirs my senses. It was not too long that the rain clouds were blown away by the wind and the sun emerged again. I suppose like flowers, they need both the rain and the sun to be able to grow and I need these ("rainy") times to appreciate the good times, to treasure the happy moments and to be able to grow - well.. spiritually and mentally in these aspects at least.

More importantly, to recognise that my God is sovereign and to press forward and wait for the sun to come forth again in rainy days in my life. It can't rain forever.

Lately, whenever I see dark clouds looming again, the first thing I try to look out for is where is the silver lining. When I spot it, it still is as beautiful. I hope in 2009, I continue to look to God - my silver lining, come what may.

4 years ago...

4 years ago - Someone broke my heart and my life was in shambles.
4 years ago - I was not in Your house and I knew You but felt You were distant.
4 years ago - I was estranged from my family and my life lost its colour when my heart was broken.

4 years ago - I wanted to further my studies for a degree but didn't know how.
4 years ago - I didn't think I could believe in love again.
4 years ago - I didn't think I could even trust men (even as friends) again.
4 years ago - I didn't think I would excel in my job.
4 years ago - Most of my friends then were his friends, my own set of friends had their own lives or were overseas.

4 years ago - Bitterness, Cynicism, Distrust, engulfed me.
4 years ago - I was self-driven but empty.

Since coming back to His house, He has changed all that.

During this Sunday's praise and worship, the Lord reminded me where I was 4 years ago and where I am now and how He brought about that transformation in my life. My heart was filled with gratefulness and thanks. I thanked Him for what He has done and is about to do.



Looking back at that past 4 years, I don't expect to be in His house.
But things started to change when the prodigal daughter came back to the Father's house...



I didn't expect to make many friends, brothers and sisters whom I now called my extended family. And a number of these people who were once total strangers and I didn't know of their existence... I have grown to love them.



I didn't expect my family members to become closer than before and to have the honor of worshipping Him in the same house.



I didn't think I could work full time and study my bachelor's part time, sponsored myself, stayed sane amongst the busy schedule and most of all, to graduate with a degree with honors.



I didn't think that while studying part-time, I was promoted twice consecutively in my job.



I didn't expect my poly best friend, Joan and I to rekindle and yet our love for each other remained strong and intact.

I didn't expect to be married to a fantastic husband who is also now one of my best friends.



I didn't expect Him to use whatever experience I had in my life, good and well the not so good to help and bring His hope to others who are in the same situations I was previously.



I didn't expect myself to be filled again with His hope and His love so much so that the colours in my life are more vibrant than before.



I didn't expect I could have the courage to believe in myself and believe in others too.



I didn't think I could pick myself up from a fall but He came down into the pit to carry me up and out of it... helped me stand on my feet and showed me how to walk again.



During worship today, He told me that where I am now is only a fraction of what He is going to do in my life. My mind was blown away when I heard that.



I want to pen this down as an 'altar' in my life of what He has done in my life since 4 years ago, to thank Him for His deliverance, His hand upon me and what He is going to do still in my years to come. Whatever it is...I know He has given me meaning and reason to my existence.



I pray some day next time, I will look back at this entry and be grateful to Him of what He has done in my life lest I become forgetful of His goodness and faithfulness and troubles seem too overbearing.



What about you? Where were you few years ago? =)